Comedy Quotes » Phoenix Nights Quotes

Phoenix Nights Quotes

Buy Peter Kay’s Phoenix Nights – Series 1 and 2 Box Set [DVD]

Phoenix-Nights

  • [Max is almost run over leaving a French Supermarket with a trolley full of alcohol] Max: Hey. Le Beer. Le Dickhead. Watch it son.
  • I don’t know whether you’ve noticed but I’m disabled.
  • [receiving a prank telephone call] Sick. Animals. Laughing at death, half past three in the bloody morning.
  • Police probe Leeds girl’s snatch. Can you help?
  • Brian Potter: Don’t talk to me about upper body strength, Lesley! My forearms are massive!
    Les: An’ we all know why that is don’t we? Too much “Trumpet Polishin’
  • Hey, toilet-mouth! There’s a child’s bike outside!
  • I want to speak to the organist, not the monkey grinder.
  • There is a horse in my cabaret suite
  • I know a pissed horse when I see one!
  • Come and get your black bin bags
    They’re on offer till December
    Come and get your black bin bags
    They’re long and black and slender Heavy duty black bin bags
    No matter what your gender
    Heavy duty black bin bags
    Whether bi or straight or bender
    Heavy duty black bin bags
    Something to remember
    Just rip with me and rip with me And tear with me right now
    Just rip with me and rip with me and TYar with me right now
    Fill em’ up now!

Peter Kay’s Phoenix Nights is a British sitcom about The Phoenix Club, a working men’s club in the northern English town of Farnworth, Greater Manchester.